I can't express how thankful we are to have our church in our lives... especially Pastor Mike Kai, Pastor Lisa Kai, Pastor Brian Aki, Pastor Frank de Gracia... they have all been wonderful in helping us with the loss of our babies and the gain of our angels...
Opening Prayer and message of hope was given by Pastor Frank... it was beautiful and brought me to tears...
Here are the words from Shane, Jazlynn, and me as we honored our girls...
Shane :
I would like to thank
everyone for coming out today to support my family.
Through this difficult
situation, I’ve learned that sometimes in life, we wanna question GOD and we
want to find the reason behind his doings because maybe we don’t understand why
things happen. We try to make sense of
things but we really can’t figure it out.
SCRIPTURE - Proverbs 3:4-6
That’s why I know that
everything happens for a reason. He
knows the past, present, and future. As a family, we know
that Arianna and Brianna are always with us. We tell Jaz and Jayden that they
have angel sisters watching over them.
For me, I don’t question the
LORD because I have my full faith and love in him. So I know that our angels
are now safe in heaven with our heavenly Father.
Arianna,
I miss you so much.
Brianna,
I miss you so much too.
I hope
the both of you don’t fight because Brianna, you were punching your sister when
you were in mommy’s stomach.
After
you passed away, one of the nurses called and said that she misses you girls
because you were the smallest babies in the room.
And I
know that we only met for 1 day, but we will always be together. Forever
I just
want to let you know that mommy, daddy, Jayden, and I love you girls so much.
Nikki:
The
love and support that we have received is amazing… from cards and flowers,
emails and texts, to simple smiles and hugs… we find peace and comfort in
knowing that there are friends and family that care so much… and we are so
grateful for the outpouring of support… it means so much to know that people do
care.
It’s
been exactly 3 weeks since the passing of our little twin girls and there is
not a day that goes by that I do not think of them. I sit and wonder what I would be doing if
they were still in my tummy. How strong
their kicks would be by now, if we would have the nursery
almost done. But these are all just
thoughts and painful visions of a shattered dream.
I
never thought I would have to speak at my child or children’s funeral or
“Celebration of Life” services… Situations
like this are not what a mother thinks of when she finds out she’s pregnant or
even after their child is born. I did,
however, think about my children speaking at my own… all the crazy things they
would say… but I would hope they would know that their mom loved them without
having to ask or be told… because I do love each of my children so much, no
matter if they are big or small, blonde or brunette, sassy or sweet, born on
time or born too soon, on earth or in heaven… I love all of my children so much
that I would give my own life to save the life of my dying child if I could…
I
think in this time of grief and despair, I find it difficult to have understanding
and to see the blessings… I often pray for things that I want to happen or more
like wish would happen… I pray for things to go back to the way it was, I pray
for my babies back, I pray that this is all a bad dream… but I have to believe,
I have to have the strong faith like Shane, and need to trust in the Lord and
not my own understanding… I am growing stronger every day because I have to for
my husband and children. I wrote a prayer the day after I came home from the
hospital that I would like to share…
Heavenly Father... Please stop my
tears... I need you now more than ever, please let me know that you are near...
There are no baby cries to be heard,
no little lullabies share... Since my precious little babies are no longer
here...
I feel like I can't breathe, I
sometimes feel lost and so mad, can you hear me when I cry out, Lord, why did
you need them in heaven so bad...
I know they're our 2 little angels now and hope they're having fun, but I can't help but wish they were here... Our lives together had only just begun...
Both my babies were perfect, each with 10 little fingers and 10 little toes... And big beautiful blue-gray eyes and each with a cute little button nose...
Lord, you know I had these big dreams and visions of our future... I break down and wish it were still here and not close to being over...
To my sweet Arianna and Brianna, you are so loved and missed every second of the day, mommy feels an empty place in my life where my babies are supposed to play...
Arianna, I remember thinking, you would be our sweet calm baby... Full of beauty and peace, our precious little lady...
Brianna, I remember laughing because you moved so much, I imagined you would be our little trouble-maker, but now just long for your touch…
I sit in the quiet, where I wish I
could to hear one of you cry, I never ever imagined holding you both for the
first time, and having to say good-bye...
Please remember your big sisters, Jazlynn and Jayden... They were so excited to get to play with you and to decide who was going to be their favorite...
Jaz would have held you, fed you, and protected you to no end... Jayden would have loved to be your 2nd mommy and play dress-up, make-up, and all kinds of pretend...
They are so proud to say they have 2 angel sisters, please watch and protect them every day and remind them that you're both still with us...
And most of all, please remember your daddy... If he could move heaven and earth, he would, just to protect his family...
Daddy reminds us of how blessed we are to have each other... And he loves all of his girls so much and has been the rock and strength that keeps things together.
Ari and Bri please know how much I love you girls... mommy misses you both every day but know you will always be part of my world...
I know I'll hold you again, in heaven, that's the plan... I'll think of you both every day and try to go on with life the best that I can...
My precious little angels... I so want to be with you... and Lord help me to get thru this heartache, please guide my way thru...
I know that things will get easier and my peace will find its way, just like how I know I will always love and miss my little angels...
In Jesus name, I pray... Amen
Closing prayer was given by Pastor Brian... the strengh we needed to move forward...
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